At the start of a new year it’s a good time to take stock of where we are emotionally and mentally. And writing a letter to your younger self is one fun and therapeutic way to do that. I did this as a personal exercise a few years ago, have used it for group sessions with others, and now sharing it here.

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Dear Younger Me,

You’re only 4 years now.

You’re becoming self-aware. As you grow older, there’ll be the fear of rejection and abandonment, an uncertainty of where you belong and whose you are. Many days you will feel like you’re somewhere between this … and that … .You’ll be torn in your affections … betwixt and between two locations … displaced in your emotions. But you will find yourself, you will find your way, you will find your voice, and you will find your strength.

You’re on your way to university now.

This is where your life will dramatically change. You’ll develop a deep yearning to change the world around you. Your experiences will lead you to become a fierce defender of people’s rights, you’ll champion causes like ending violence against women and girls.

The challenges will seem insurmountable, but you’ll graduate among the top of your class. Don’t get sidetracked my determined self. This tenacity will set you up for life.

You’re inquisitive. You want to see the bigger world. Your desire to change the world and your desire to travel the world, will lead you into your purpose.

You’ve landed you dream job now!

There are so many adventures ahead of you. You’ll travel to just about every continent. Through your work you’ll directly impact the lives of people in different parts of the world. You will get the greatest satisfaction from helping others.

On this journey that is your life, you’ll learn some lessons along the way. You do not know them now which is why I’m writing you this letter, just trust my words and live by these:

1. Never ever take your relationship with God for granted. Do nothing, make no decisions and take no actions till you pray and you have His answer. In your darkest moments you will know how to find your light in Him.
2. Trust your instincts! Take chances! It’s ok to make mistakes! Be gentle with yourself! Believe in yourself! You are far more resilient than you think. Your heart will break, but you have an amazing ability to forgive and a huge capacity to love. You’ve got bouncebackability my darling self—trust your heart.
3. Don’t try to fit in (you won’t be able to anyway, you’ll be the tallest girl just about everywhere you go, and even so, you’ll love to wear 4 inches heels😊). You were born to stand out my unique self. Don’t try to fit in. Embrace everything about you, FLAWSOMEness and all.
4. Don’t live by the status quo. Live your life by whatever makes you feel most alive … like when you write poems or when you’re empowering young girls. Embrace the uniqueness that is you. Don’t let anyone determine your worth, or measure your value by their standards.
5. And lastly, choose your friends wisely. You’ll never be the popular girl. You’ll have very few friends but they’ll be just what you need to hold space for you, free of judgement and with empathy. Treasure them. You’ll need them along the ups and downs of this journey that will be your life.

Your life journey will be challenging but it will be balanced with joy. You’ll smile more than you cry, you’ll gain more than you lose, and you will love and be LOVED!

Live boldly and fiercely in humility and with love. Through it all you’ll be okay.

I love you❤️
Your older you

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If you’d like to do a similar exercise, see “A Letter to Your Younger Self: The How To”.

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In creative solidarity, Dee